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Most Common Relationship Problems
Life Lessons

Most Common Relationship Problems

by Jeff Dailey
written by Jeff Dailey

10 of the Most Common Relationship Problems

Relationships are not easy. It takes hard work from both people to make one work. Even when working hard at a relationship, some issues are faced by most couples. The following are some of those common relationship problems, so you can prepare yourself. Most Common Relationship Problems

#1: Affair – Infidelity

Emotional, physical, and even financial infidelity happens in relationships for many reasons. While many relationships end because of this problem, some couples are able to recover from it. Recovering from it takes time and a lot of work from both people.

#2: Sexual Problems

Men and women who spend many years together often go through this problem once or twice. Libido can wax and wane throughout the relationship. Getting through it means being open and honest with your partner.

#3: Differences in Core Values and Beliefs

No two people are the same. Values and beliefs can be different, and they can change over time, causing many problems in the relationship. Being able to respect one another is a good way to approach this common relationship problem.

#4: Traumatic Event

When something traumatic happens in life, the consequences can be devastating for a relationship. Life changes because of the event, and that causes people to change at a deep level. Many couples can come out of traumatic events stronger than ever, while others find it’s better to separate.

#5: Boredom

The monotony of a relationship causes boredom. It’s important to keep the excitement in a relationship by introducing new activities into it. Spending time together is also important, since many people lead busy lives.

#6: Family Issues

Families can become a huge burden on a relationship. What’s important to remember is that a relationship does not have to include extended family. Extended family is only included as much as you allow it.

#7: Unrealistic Expectations

When expectations are set too high in a relationship, there’s often disappointment. It’s important to understand your partner and discuss issues that come up, so there are no expectations that may not be met.

#8: Addiction

Addiction plagues many couples. Getting through the addiction depends on the willingness of the addict getting help.

#9: Minimal Support

Support is so important in a relationship. Being there for your partner providing encouragement can do wonders for the love couples feel between one another.

#10: Parental Disagreements

This is one of the most common relationship problems with couples who have children. Sometimes, parents won’t agree on what to do in a particular situation, and that can cause tension between them. Many parents can get through it easily, while others struggle for a long time.

Do You Need Help with these Common Relationship Problems?

If you need help with these common relationship problems, contact Kendall Van Blarcom. He can help you by listening to your problems, providing advice, and guidance, so you can solve the issues in your relationship.
Learn more about personal consulting by Kendall Van Blarcom here.

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10 Dementia Warning Signs to Look for this Holiday Season
Life Lessons

Help Writing Note after Loss of Mother

by Kendall VanBlarcom
written by Kendall VanBlarcom

Tips for Writing a Sympathy Message for the Loss of a Mother

Losing a mother is one of life’s greatest pains. No matter how she died or when she did, it hurts. When you are dealing with this agony or trying to help someone deal with it, you may find some help with a sympathy message for the loss of a mother. It can help ease the pain for yourself or a loved one. Consider these sympathy messages for the loss of a mother. Help Writing Note after Loss of Mother
_________________________
No one comes close to the love a mother has for her child. Remember that love each day and keep it safe in your heart.
A mother builds your heart in her womb. That heart is inside of you forever, no matter where she has gone.
Peace …relaxation…comfort are what she feels now. Know she is in a special place looking down on you with a smile on her face.
Your mother has done everything she could to raise you right. Move forward with her smile, words, and presence inside of you each day.
A mother may not be by your side, but she will always be in your heart.
Feel your mother’s presence…even if she isn’t in this world anymore.
A mother’s hug lingers forever – hold onto it forever.
Your mother’s words will remain with you when she has gone.
You are who you are because of your mother.
Hold on tight to your mother’s memories. They cannot be taken from you.
Strong, loyal, and affectionate – your mother will always be…
Your mother took care of you, and now God takes care of her.

Words for a Sympathy Message for the Loss of a Mother

If you’re writing a sympathy message to a loved one who has lost his or her mother, consider these:
My deepest sympathies during this trying time. Your mother was a great person and she will always be one in our hearts.
Your mother defined beauty. No one is or will be quite like her.
Heaven gained an angel today. God Bless You.
Look up – your mother is looking down upon you with approval and a smile.
We are sorry for the loss of your mother. She was a kind-hearted woman who was perfect in many ways. She will continue to live through you.
Whenever I see you, I am reminded of your mother. You are carrying your mother’s memories forward. For that, you are awesome.
Your mother accomplished all she had to in this life. Now, it’s time for peace.
Wishing you peace, comfort, and the warmth only your mother could give you with thoughts of her in your heart.
Think about what you would like someone to say to you when your mother passes or passed. This can help you write your own sympathy message. I hope at least one sympathy message for the loss of a mother helped you find some peace during this very difficult time.
Please know I am here for you, as you cope with this loss. Grieving is hard on the psyche and can affect the rest of your life greatly. Seek comfort and guidance through personal consulting. Contact me now here.

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Life Lessons

Improving Mood of Senior Loved Ones

by Kimberly Johnson
written by Kimberly Johnson

Improving Mood of Senior Loved Ones

Improving Mood Senior Loved OnesOne of the most popular concerns caregivers have is that their senior is “always in a bad mood.” As much as they try to make them feel better, they are stuck in this miserable state. This can make it difficult to be with the person, and even more upsetting when there’s no choice but be with the person for most of the day. Improving Mood Senior Loved Ones

Causes of Bad Mood in Seniors

Before tackling changing the mood of your senior loved one, it’s important to learn what the cause of it could be.

Stress

If your loved one is under stress (this can be physical, emotional, financial, etc.), it will be much harder for him to smile and be happy. It’s hard to be positive when it seems like life is one challenge after another.

Health

A bad mood can be a sign of physical or mental decline. As the body gets older, it has a harder time keeping up and that can be tiring. This exhaustion often comes through as a bad mood.

Medication

A potential side effect of medication is bad mood. It’s also possible that the side effects can cause the user to be in a bad mood. For example, if headache, upset stomach, and dry mouth are side effects of a medication that can be frustrating and cause the senior to be in a bad mood.

Personality

Some seniors are in a bad mood because that’s just the way they are – it’s part of their personality. There are just some people who cannot see the positives in their life and refuse to be happy with the world around them. There’s not much that can be done when someone’s personality causes them to be in a bad mood.

What to Do About It

Understanding the cause of the bad mood can help you put things in better perspective. You’re able to see that it’s not really your loved one, but what is happening to him – unless it’s his personality.
To help lift the spirits of your loved one, try to turn him away from what is causing the bad mood. For example, if it’s stress, try to fill his time with activities he will enjoy. If it’s health related or medication, see if you can speak to the doctor about it. Treatment for a condition or medication changes can help turn a bad mood into a good one. If it’s personality, you’ll need to get a little more creative. Don’t try to change who your loved one is because it will just make the situation worse. What you can do take it in small doses. When spending time with your loved one, try to remain positive yourself. When you feel your energy dwindling because of the misery of your loved one, step away. Take a break and talk to a friend who is usually in a good mood.
As hard as it is to step away from your loved one when he is in a bad mood, know that being stuck is going to affect your mood, and that’s not fair to you. It might be beneficial to speak to a personal consultant like Kendall Van Blarcom when you’re faced with the effects of your loved one’s mood. He has a lot of experience working with people who are going through exactly what you are.
If you feel that your loved one just needs someone to speak to that will help him turn his mood around, Kendall has experience in that too. As a marriage and family therapist for many years, he has been able to help many people improve their lives.
Contact him today for more information on how personal consulting can help you or your senior loved one.
Kendall Van Blarcom
www.KvanB.com

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Could you use a 'Stop Doing' list?
Life Lessons

Could you use a 'Stop Doing' list?

by Kimberly Johnson
written by Kimberly Johnson

00003965Could you use a ‘Stop Doing’ list?

One of the tried and true organization and time-management tools is the trusty old “to do” list. I was trained to diligently put one together at the end of the day for the following day, and whatever tasks I failed to complete, to carry it forward. This system has worked well in helping me prioritize and focus. But I have also heard many of my colleagues complain about having too much on their list, and feeling very discouraged and overwhelmed by the sheer number of items on their “To Do” list. To help ease the overwhelm, I want to introduce the concept of the “Stop Doing” list.
I first read about the “Stop Doing” list in “Good to Great” by Jim Collins. He stated that one of the commonalities of the companies who were able to propel themselves from being just good to being great is that they all looked at what they were currently doing that they needed to Stop Doing. I am implementing this idea in a slightly different way, but I think a “Stop Doing” list can actually help your productivity and effectiveness.
So how do you decide what goes on your “Stop Doing” list? Here’s what I suggest you do.
For the next week or two, each time you work on your “to do” list (and if you are not using one currently, I strongly recommend you start), or blocking off time for specific tasks in you planner, ask yourself this question: “does this task add value or generate positive results for me and my organization?” If the answer is no, it should go right on top of your “Stop Doing” list.
If the answer is “yes”, ask yourself a second question: “am I the best person to do this task?” The first question tells you whether you can eliminate a task. This question tells you whether you can delegate a task. I know for solo-business people, you automatically think that you have no one to delegate any tasks to. But actually, that might not necessarily be true. Today, there is a whole network of virtual assistants who can handle a myriad of administrative work for you. Some accept work by the hour, and some accept work by the project. If you are interested in this resource, check out www.assistu.com
For some people, you may have to then overcome your resistance to delegating. I’ve heard many of the reasons. Do these sound familiar?

  • “By the time I explain it to someone else, I could have done it myself.”
  • “I can’t trust somebody else to do it right.”
  • “It costs too much money.”

Some of these are completely legitimate concerns. However, before you dismiss the idea, consider the following:

  • Is the task repetitive so that the up-front time investment to train someone is actually worth it 3 months down the road?
  • Are you the most qualified person to complete the task, or could someone else do it in less time with less effort for better results?
  • If you didn’t have to do the task, what would you choose to spend that time on, and what impact will that have on your business, or your life?

So, after considering these tough questions, add your delegated task to your “Stop Doing” list as well and send them elsewhere, and I guarantee you will feel better.
Even though I wrote this article for people struggling with overload at work, the same approach can be applied to create a “Stop Doing” list for home. Think of the possibilities – you can delegate laundry, and cooking, and yard work, and cleaning, and what else?
Seriously, the current state of our lives is that there is generally too much to do and not enough time. So, go through this exercise at least once and see what you can shed from your “to do” list. If you like the results, then establish a routine and do this every 6 months or a year. The point is that you want to spend your time on high impact tasks, and work that you enjoy.

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What NOT to Say to Senior Parents
Life Lessons

What NOT to Say to Senior Parents

by Kimberly Johnson
written by Kimberly Johnson

What NOT to Say to Senior Parents

What NOT to Say to Senior ParentsTaking care of senior parents is not easy, so it’s normal to become frustrated sometimes. The problem is that the frustration can sometimes take over our choice of words. This is when we say things that we probably shouldn’t, and that causes some relationship issues that make the situation worse. The following are some of the things you probably shouldn’t say, even out of frustration. It’s hoped that by having this fresh in your mind, it will help you preserve your relationship. What NOT to Say to Senior Parents

#1: Don’t you remember?!

It’s likely your parents do not remember it, and probably not a lot of other things. When people say this, it’s almost saying the person is inadequate for not remembering.
It’s better to say, “Let me tell you what happened.” You can also just take the queue from the confused look on your parent’s face and go ahead and clue him/her in.

#2: Don’t say you can’t because you can. You just need to try.

I know…you’ve probably said it and you didn’t really intend on it turning out the way it did. It’s okay. The good thing about life is that you can move on with new knowledge and make different choices in the future.
What you can say instead is, “Why don’t we do it together?” or “Let me help you.” You can then gauge how much he/she can do and step back if he/she needs less help.

#3: Ugh…I just showed you yesterday. Here…I’ll show you AGAIN.

You may have showed your senior parent countless times how to use the remote, but he/she still doesn’t get it. It’s okay because that’s normal. Taking the time to teach them again means that you’re teaching him/her a little more each time.
What might be good to try is to write down the instructions. This way your parent can refer to it when needed.

#4: That has nothing to do with what I just said.

Seniors often have a difficult time focusing on conversations. Sometimes, they want to say something before they forget, which means it could be out of context. Try to go with the flow and if possible, bring up what you were trying to talk to him/her about later on in the day.

#5: You already told me that story a billion times.

Many people (not just seniors) have a hard time remembering who they told what. Seniors, especially those with dementia, have a more difficult time.
Instead of telling your parent he/she already told you, it’s better to say, “Oh yes, I remember. That was so funny!” You can also just go ahead and listen. Patience is a virtue.

#6: This is what I want when you die.

Some people don’t see anything wrong with saying this, and some even see it as a compliment. However, it does hurt some seniors to hear that loved ones are waiting for them to die. It’s best to keep this to yourself, even if you are coming from a good place with it.

Let Go of Guilt and Move On

If you’ve said any of these statements, don’t worry. Do not beat yourself up over it. We are all human and as humans, we make mistakes. Learn from those mistakes and live a better life.
As a personal consultant, I often help caregivers deal with senior parents. If you need help, please contact Kendall Van Blarcom for a personal consulting session. He can help you and your senior get along and make this stage of life an enjoyable one for both of you.
Kendall Van Blarcom
www.KvanB.com

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Providing Senior Care for a Friend or Neighbor
Life Lessons

Struggle with Allowing Someone to Care for You

by Jeff Dailey
written by Jeff Dailey

The Struggle with Allowing Someone to Care for You

Struggle with Allowing Someone to Care for YouYou would never think you would have such a hard time accepting help. All of these years, you’ve probably asked for help or just wished someone would come along who would help you. However, now that you have someone at your beck and call, you hate it. You just want to be left alone, so you can do what you need to do. Struggle with Allowing Someone to Care for You
The problem is that sometimes, you know you can’t do what you want to do. You’ve tried to do everything on your own, but you’re making more and more mistakes. It’s so hard!
While you could turn to your loved one for help, you have this feeling that it’s going to be the beginning of the end of your independence. You don’t want to give that up. It’s too troubling.
So what do you do?
It’s time to come to terms with what is going on in this stage of life.
You don’t have to relinquish everything. You have a lot of independence still inside of you, so you should take advantage of it. That does not mean you shouldn’t ask for help.
When you ask for help, you aren’t asking for someone to do everything for you. What you are asking for is someone to come in and do something you are not able to do right now.

When Help Wants to Do Everything

Some people do have a tendency to take over when they are asked for help. Instead of asking what you need, the person just steps in and does everything. This can be quite frustrating!
How you can control this is by asking for help with something specifically. For example, you can say, “Can you please place this big pot of water on the stove for me?” That’s it. You aren’t asking for that person to cook for you, or do anything else. You’re just asking to have the pot moved.
Now, if that person takes it upon him/herself to do more, you can then interject and say, “No, no, it’s okay I can do the rest.” You don’t have to say it in a way that will hurt the person’s feelings. You can just state a fact.
If this doesn’t seem like something you can say, you can always distract the person with something else you need help with such as, “Can you instead set the table for me?” or “Can you run to store for some more butter?” By giving the person a task, you end up freeing yourself from the unsolicited help, and you end up getting even more out of the deal – something you actually do need help with at the time.

Why People Don’t Get It

People have a hard time believing you still have the mental and physical capacity to do a lot of things yourself. They see the changes in you from aging, and they take what they’ve read and seen in society and place them on you. It’s not right, but it really does come from a good place.
Try these suggestions. If they don’t work, or you feel as though you still can’t ask for help at all, you may want to consider asking for help from a personal consultant like Kendall Van Blarcom. He can help you figure out what you can do about this situation, so you can start to feel better about it all.
Kendall Van Blarcom
www.kvanb.com

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Life Lessons

The Balancing Act

by Kimberly Johnson
written by Kimberly Johnson

Mature woman reading.It is hard to find balance in this information age. “The average office worker receives more than 200 messages a day via snail mail, email, express mail, cell phone, landline, wireless Web, bicycle messenger, singing telegram, you name it. Taking in information these days is like trying to drink from a fire hose.”
–Dr. Martha Beck
Did you know that one Sunday edition of The New York Times contains more information than all the written documents in the world during the 15th century? Does it seem like life is spinning out of control? The pace of life just keeps picking up! And with it, job satisfaction is on the decline.
In an Associated Press article, Marc Greenbaum, a 50-year-old professor at Suffolk Law School, stated that “I’m personally happier but I observe more people that are more miserable. There’s more pressure on them to produce, more problems with maintaining a boundary between work and family, even maintaining a boundary between work and the outside because of things like e-mail, voicemail and the Blackberry. They can’t get away.”
According to the Families and Work Institute, over 47% of U.S. workers surveyed feel overworked. In addition, 59% of Americans describe their lives as very busy according to an NBC news survey. According to Dr. Richard Swensen, author of Margin: Restoring Emotional, Physical, Financial, and Time Reserves to Overloaded Lives, the average American will spend one year in his/her life searching through desk clutter looking for misplaced objects. We are working harder and faster than ever. Being more organized can help reduce stress, save time, and improve efficiency.
We celebrate National Get Organized Week the first week in October. Most people think of “getting organized” as a physical act – clearing piles of paper, putting things away, etc. What many people overlook is the mental part of getting organized. And I always say that organizing your physical environment without first clarifying your priorities is like rearranging deck chairs on the Titanic!
Here are 8 tips to help you with the mental part of getting and staying organized. I encourage you to read through the whole list, and then go back and choose two or three ideas to implement.
1. Understand the difference between URGENT and IMPORTANT. If it’s important, it may be a vital priority for you. If it’s urgent, it’s time-sensitive, but it may or may not be important. Be sure you are clear about the difference when deciding what deserves your time. Check out the time management matrix at www.orgcoach.net/timematrix.html, which beautifully illustrates the difference.
2. Find time for yourself. Schedule time away from your work and your family. Use this opportunity to tune in to what you want and need. Don’t feel that you’re being selfish; you have a responsibility to yourself to take care of your needs. Studies show that productivity dramatically increases when you are well rested.
3. Check for balance between these four vital areas of your life:

  • Well-being – caring for your physical, mental, spiritual, and social needs
  • Family relationships
  • Work activities
  • Service activities – volunteer work, being a good neighbor, practicing random acts of kindness

4. Live your life in the present! Quit saying, “I’ll do this when I get around to it.” I have yet to find a person who said on their death bed, “I wish I had spent more time at the office.”
5. Increase productivity by planning your week and fine-tuning your workday. Block out time to handle priorities. Important tips to remember as you plan your week:

  • Have unscheduled time in your calendar for handling unexpected but important tasks.
  • Plan to work on creative activities during the time of day when you are at your best.
  • Schedule “protected time” to work on projects that need your undivided attention. If interruptions are eating you alive, close your door and ask that people come back to see you at a designated time.
  • Temporarily turn off the audio feature on your cell phone, pager and email account. Pick and choose when you respond and when it’s appropriate to let calls go into voice mail.
  • Be realistic about your expectations. Don’t set yourself up for failure by planning too much in one day.
  • Leave work at a reasonable hour so you have time for those other three areas of your life – self-care, family, and service to others.

6. Reduce your stress by being underwhelmed. Here are a few tips to help you avoid getting overwhelmed:

  • NO is a complete sentence. Don’t bite off more than you can chew. When someone makes a request, buy some time before answering. Say, “Let me think about it,” or “I’m in the middle of something right now. I’ll call you back and let you know.” This will give you time to evaluate the situation and decide if it’s something you truly want to do.
  • Delegate as much as you can. Focus your time on activities that you enjoy and are best at.

7. Stay out of e-mail jail. Here are a few tips to help:

  • Determine frequency of checking for e-mail messages. Some people choose to check it throughout the day and even use such devices as the Blackberry when on the road, while others only check for messages a couple times a day. You are the only one who can determine what will work for you.
  • Use the F.A.T. (File, Act, Toss) method to keep your email inbox from piling up. If a message needs to be filed for future reference, place it in the appropriate email subject or contact folder. Place a red flag next to those items you need to act on but don’t have time to do right at the moment. Immediately toss (delete or forward) anything you don’t need to keep.
  • Remove your name from subscription lists that do not provide value to you.

8. Set up your work environment to keep your focus on what’s most important. Here are some tips:

  • Arrange your workspace so you have the most commonly-used things close in. Store things used less frequently in less accessible space.
  • Create a filing system that enables you to find things instantly. The #1 reason that people pile instead of file is a fear of not being able to find it when they need it. Visit www.orgcoach.net/PaperTiger.html for some ideas.
  • Create a tickler file system to remind you of important follow up at the appropriate time. The #2 reason that people pile is a fear of forgetting to do something that is out-of-sight and out-of-mind. A good tickler system reminds you to follow up on the appropriate date, and provides an alternative to that “I’ll just set it here for now” pile. Visit www.orgcoach.net/products/tickle.html#ticklerfile to see what a good tickler file system looks like.
  • Use the F.A.T. (File, Act, Toss) method to process your mail daily. Review our Trim the F.A.T. tip sheet at www.orgcoach.net/trimthefat.html.
  • Keep only what you plan to focus on today on your desktop. Remove visual distractions from your workspace so your attention is not pulled away from what you’ve chosen to work on today! Everything else should be put away until it’s time for you to focus on it.
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Life Lessons

Managing Relationships During the Holidays

by Kimberly Johnson
written by Kimberly Johnson

Managing Relationships During the Holidays

Spoiler Alert: It is not about them. Managing Relationships During the Holidays
As we approach Thanksgiving and Christmas, many of us will have the opportunity to gather with family and friends. There is so much joy this time of year. Managing Relationships During the Holidays
shutterstock_197760704Whatever the makeup of your family, everyone feels a little stressed during the holidays. Some of you may feel a little more like Marge Simpson than Carol Brady as you entertain or attend large gatherings.
Expectations are formed, finances and gift giving come to the forefront, perfectionism can sneak in–any one of which can lead to anxiety. Unchecked, these can also result in holiday depression.
Wow, Gem, what a downer you are! Actually, I’m an optimist. That is why I want to talk turkey (get it, turkey) with you about your own heart as we continue on through the season.
I want to address just one idea that may help ease any tension that may arise as you get together with others. And this is the cool part. It is not about them. This is something you can choose to do for yourself. And it may help you achieve peace even in the midst of what can be a busy season.
Two words: Loving Detachment.
This not a new idea. Both the spiritual direction and 12-step communities have long touted the virtues of detachment.
In other words, everyone gets to decide for themselves how they will act, what they will say, what they will do. The key to your peace is to let go and let them. The great news is that you get to decide how you will act, what you will say and what you will do.
Detachment
You simply allow the other person to do what they are already doing…living their life the way they want to.
“But you don’t understand, my uncle so-and-so is a real jerk. I can’t stand the way he drones on and on.” I hear you. That can be very disturbing and downright angering. But what good does that stomach acid do you?
Another of my favorite 12-step phrases: “Keep your own side of the street clean.” Once again, your uncle gets to decide his own curb appeal and so do you.
Allow the person to be who they are, here and now. You don’t have to be hooked onto their dynamic, you simply let go.
Loving
You can engage without judgment or anxiety. It is our own self-talk that usually exacerbates the already aggravating situation.
Take your own inner dialogue down a notch. And then change it up. Come up with creative loving thoughts and activities that turn your heart toward the person in a loving way.
You could think of one of their good qualities and be thankful for that. You could pray for them (while they are droning) about the hard time they are experiencing at work or at home. Again, without judgment. You keep your heart open to them as a person, while protecting yourself from their acidity.
It is a beautiful thing to remember that each and every one of us is on a journey. We are all in process. Some are walking their process and others are not. But it is their choice.
The gift we give to ourselves and to others is the grace to let each one move at their own pace, by their own choice.

By Gem Fadling. Reprinted with permission. Check out Gem’s website, Presence, where she writes and provides resources for women who are learning to be fully present in a distracted world.

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Life Lessons

Where DO you get the time?

by Kimberly Johnson
written by Kimberly Johnson

4.1.1Why does it so often seem like you turn around and it’s midnight when you’re raising your kids or working a demanding job? It seems like no matter what you do sometimes, there’s still a lot more work to do by the time you are ready to go to bed. What can you do? Where DO you get the time?
The first thing you need to do is figure out where your time is going each day. Try making notes one day about what you do and how long it takes. If you’re feeling really ambitious, you can try this for a week, since every day is going to be different, but even one day will give you an idea as to where you’re using up all your time. It may feel like you’re wasting time writing these things down, and they will slow you down a bit for that day, but it can be a big help.
Take a look at what you spent your day doing. Now assign a priority to each. How much time would you prefer to spend on each?
Now if you add all these up, you’ll probably find out your day is more than 24 hours long if you include time to sleep. That’s how it is being a parent.
The first thing you need to do is figure out what items can be done less often. Can you stand a little mess in the house? Can everyone else? Can you get more help from your spouse and the kids in keeping the house clean? You’ll have to decide which solution is right for you.
What about time spent surfing the internet or watching TV? Give yourself time limits on each of these. If you have a Tivo or a VCR, try recording your favorite shows and watching them a little later, skipping the commercials. Not only does this allow you to choose the time you watch your shows, it can cut down their length.
Sometimes it can be hard finding enough time in your day to be with your kids, yet most parents will call this a priority. Just remember that time with your kids isn’t just about having fun. Even small children can help out with making dinner, which can be a great time for talking with kids of any age. My three year old daughter has been helping make salads since she was two. The lettuce ends up in either rather large or very small pieces, but she has fun helping and we get some great time together. Older kids may or may not appreciate this time, but it’s good for them to help out.
I definitely do not recommend cutting back on whatever meals you insist on eating as a family. This is a great thing to do as a family, and if you aren’t making time for family meals, find a way to do so! Even if it’s just dinner one night a week together, no activities or sports to run off too, your family needs the time to relax together.
Finally, are there things you can cut out all together? If you feel as though you’ve been pushed into doing things for others because you’re at home and “have time,” don’t feel guilty about telling people that you do not have the time to do things they want you to do. Your family comes first. If you really want to volunteer, think about either cutting back the number of hours when you need more time for yourself or your family, or volunteering for something you can do as a family.
There are only so many hours to a day, and so many things you’d love to get done. Take a good look at what you need to do, want to do and don’t really need to do, and you can find ways to feel a little less overwhelmed most of the time. You’ll go through times where there just aren’t enough hours in the day even when you know your priorities, but you can cut down on the less important stuff and relieve a lot of your stress.

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